I get most of my blog traffic from links on other blogs. You can see my own blog list on your left side (scroll down a bit - and don't be afraid to ask me a question on formspring now that you're watching that part of my blog!), but I'm going to do an extra special mention of the blogs that I get the most traffic from:
http://www.metalbondnyc.com - I think he only recently added me to his very long list of interesting bondage sites and blogs, but I still got quite a bit of traffic from that. Anyway - great site to follow, great variety of topics, something for everyone really.
http://badgroveboy.com/ - I think I mentioned this blog many times already, but this is really one of my favourite blogs... only downside is that the boy doesn't update enough :P
http://lockedndenied.blogspot.com/ - I get a lot of traffic from this blog as well; I hope those visitors aren't too disappointed since I hardly talk about chastity anymore...
http://bondageforthebigman.blogspot.com - Great blog if you like chubby guys in bondage, a mix of vids/pics from the 'net and personal experiences.
So if you don't follow these yet, do it now!
Anyway, since I'm getting many new visitors and followers, maybe I should explain a few things about my blog. It's a personal blog, which means I talk about my own experiences, wishes, turn-ons etc. It also means I'm not shying away from talking about some negative experiences and feelings. Like I said before, I'm not a porn blog, but a real-life blog, and bad things happen. I think the BDSM community as a whole tends to see itself through rose-coloured glasses, and people new to it might think everything is easy and fun and bad stuff can never happen. I hope my blog is fairly balanced in that regard. It also means my blog is more boring than 99% of kink blogs out there, but so be it.
It's also not meant to be a manual for other people or a "this is how it should be" guide to BDSM, just my own experiences and other personal stuff. For example, when I write down what happened in a BDSM session, I really write that for myself, so I won't forget basically. I like reading old session entries, and old entries in general really, sometimes it's a nice memory, other times less nice, but for me it's good that I've written them down. If people enjoy reading them and if I can inspire someone with it, that's nice, but not my main goal at all.
I read quite a few kinky blogs, and often I think "oh that's interesting, I should comment, or write about it in my own blog". But, of course, I rarely do. I know I read a few interesting entries a week or two ago, but I forgot which blogs, and I'm too lazy to find out, sorry :) But there are two recent entries I want to talk about.
First is an entry on Master Dream's Precious Treasure. I'll let you read it, but basically it's about people who aren't owned/collared/whatever think they have nothing interesting to say. I disagree with that as well. They shouldn't feel intimidated by more experienced people, and like MDPT says, they have their own dreams and aspirations, and it might not be a bad thing to write that all down. The fact that you're inexperienced doesn't mean you have nothing to say.
(Side note: I know most of my readers are gay males, but MDPT really is an interesting blog to follow, regardless of your gender and sexual preferences)
Secondly, my Boss (...or is he? :P) made an entry about him now being owned by a younger guy. We talked about this, and he seems to be very insecure about the age difference (which admittedly is pretty big). I think it can work, and personally I feel the distance is a bigger problem than the age difference.
I have a few things to say about this in general though (yes, I'm going to start ranting). In my experience, there are a lot of unwritten rules in the BDSM world. One of those is that older should always dominate younger. While I think this is more or less natural, as in, the older guy teaches the young guy, akin to pederasty in ancient Greece, I find that imposing it as a rule to be limited, old-fashioned and maybe even degrading for younger guys. Just because you're older doesn't mean you're better at something. Just because you're young doesn't mean you can't be a dom. I get the impression younger doms don't get taken seriously by some of the less flexible and less open-minded people.
A lot of people really have that limited "this is what BDSM is supposed to be like and nothing else" mindset, which upsets me. They are limiting themselves to new experiences and setting a bad example for others. Sure, everyone has his or her own idea of what BDSM should be for them personally, but they shouldn't apply their own vision onto others. Everyone's different. But I do think there should only be one basic, general rule, and that's that everything must happen safe, sane and consensual. All the rest is up to personal preferences, and I think it's wrong to force anything other than that onto people.
This is why I try not to judge other people and their BDSM relationship... it's their thing, as long as they enjoy it, who am I to judge them? I'm happy there are plenty of non-judgmental people around, but really, sometimes it can annoy me greatly.
That'll be enough for today :)
http://lockedndenied.blogspot.com/ - I get a lot of traffic from this blog as well; I hope those visitors aren't too disappointed since I hardly talk about chastity anymore...
http://bondageforthebigman.blogspot.com - Great blog if you like chubby guys in bondage, a mix of vids/pics from the 'net and personal experiences.
So if you don't follow these yet, do it now!
Anyway, since I'm getting many new visitors and followers, maybe I should explain a few things about my blog. It's a personal blog, which means I talk about my own experiences, wishes, turn-ons etc. It also means I'm not shying away from talking about some negative experiences and feelings. Like I said before, I'm not a porn blog, but a real-life blog, and bad things happen. I think the BDSM community as a whole tends to see itself through rose-coloured glasses, and people new to it might think everything is easy and fun and bad stuff can never happen. I hope my blog is fairly balanced in that regard. It also means my blog is more boring than 99% of kink blogs out there, but so be it.
It's also not meant to be a manual for other people or a "this is how it should be" guide to BDSM, just my own experiences and other personal stuff. For example, when I write down what happened in a BDSM session, I really write that for myself, so I won't forget basically. I like reading old session entries, and old entries in general really, sometimes it's a nice memory, other times less nice, but for me it's good that I've written them down. If people enjoy reading them and if I can inspire someone with it, that's nice, but not my main goal at all.
I read quite a few kinky blogs, and often I think "oh that's interesting, I should comment, or write about it in my own blog". But, of course, I rarely do. I know I read a few interesting entries a week or two ago, but I forgot which blogs, and I'm too lazy to find out, sorry :) But there are two recent entries I want to talk about.
First is an entry on Master Dream's Precious Treasure. I'll let you read it, but basically it's about people who aren't owned/collared/whatever think they have nothing interesting to say. I disagree with that as well. They shouldn't feel intimidated by more experienced people, and like MDPT says, they have their own dreams and aspirations, and it might not be a bad thing to write that all down. The fact that you're inexperienced doesn't mean you have nothing to say.
(Side note: I know most of my readers are gay males, but MDPT really is an interesting blog to follow, regardless of your gender and sexual preferences)
Secondly, my Boss (...or is he? :P) made an entry about him now being owned by a younger guy. We talked about this, and he seems to be very insecure about the age difference (which admittedly is pretty big). I think it can work, and personally I feel the distance is a bigger problem than the age difference.
I have a few things to say about this in general though (yes, I'm going to start ranting). In my experience, there are a lot of unwritten rules in the BDSM world. One of those is that older should always dominate younger. While I think this is more or less natural, as in, the older guy teaches the young guy, akin to pederasty in ancient Greece, I find that imposing it as a rule to be limited, old-fashioned and maybe even degrading for younger guys. Just because you're older doesn't mean you're better at something. Just because you're young doesn't mean you can't be a dom. I get the impression younger doms don't get taken seriously by some of the less flexible and less open-minded people.
A lot of people really have that limited "this is what BDSM is supposed to be like and nothing else" mindset, which upsets me. They are limiting themselves to new experiences and setting a bad example for others. Sure, everyone has his or her own idea of what BDSM should be for them personally, but they shouldn't apply their own vision onto others. Everyone's different. But I do think there should only be one basic, general rule, and that's that everything must happen safe, sane and consensual. All the rest is up to personal preferences, and I think it's wrong to force anything other than that onto people.
This is why I try not to judge other people and their BDSM relationship... it's their thing, as long as they enjoy it, who am I to judge them? I'm happy there are plenty of non-judgmental people around, but really, sometimes it can annoy me greatly.
That'll be enough for today :)
Thanks for the mention! I'm gonna do a blog round up myself, been a while since I have.
ReplyDeleteWhat you say about the BDSM world is SO true. I think it's very ignorant and arrogant to think things have to be done in a certain way for it to be a true BDSM experience. Every BDSM experience is a true experience.
And I believe when you get involved in BDSM, you never stop learning and experiencing, and I hope I never do. People that think there isn't more to learn really aren't doing themselves any favours.
That's just my 2 pence worth. :o)
You're welcome about the mention!
DeleteAnd you actually said what I wanted to say better than I did!
Many thanks for your entry from my side also!
ReplyDeleteI think that while fantasy is great, real-life reports are so much more fantastic and valuable, providing authentic insight! Your honesty is outstanding and marking this blog as one of the hottest for me, not being boring at all thereby, though you mentioned it to potentially be more boring than others - just let me assure you that it is far from it.
I fully agree with your approach that there is no general rule to BDSM unless the SSC-rule (safe, sane, consensual), and anything beyond will depend on individual circumstances with no-one to judge if done within such SSC circumstances, with everyone involved benefitting and enjoying it to the max. I more than often mentioned such myself while commenting in many blogs, although I am also quite inexperienced in real-life, as you know. And again, I am most aware that even though I fully agree to your entry regarding it, I unfortunately composed a most misinterpretable comment myself regarding you, still regretting to have done so, as I was in no position to do so due to my lack of experience in real-life, although with best intentions back then, but now knowing that it was very far from even being appropriate. You told me not to worry about it, but I still do, taking appropriate measures not to ever let such happen again, and I really hope that it will indeed never happen again, especially since I do not want to annoy you in any way and never wanted to do so.
I also agree to your point about forcing one's own preference or maybe strict and thereby limited view upon another individual. However, I think that personal preferences, which everyone has, limit our view on things anyway, so basically no-one can be fully open to each and any new experience, without me saying that they have limited mindsets. To force such preferences upon another individual who is unwilling to act this way is absolutely wrong, and I think we agree on that, but to exchange on it, mutual respect given, might be of benefit for both involved, with the chance to get new insight for everyone involved, as preferences might also change. I have to say that I have deep respect and great sympathy for you, Rauber - even if it may not show in the inglorious recent comments of mine which I mentioned. I even really envy you for your bigger amount of experience. And it is far from that my current preferences would limit me from making more real-life experience though, but just the chance to do so.
I agree on your point about younger doms. Especially as I started as an older sub, thereby repelled by the visions and views of older doms I got in contact with, never being able to submit to them in real-life. The concept of a relation or even session with a younger top is really intense, as it goes against the established view, and thereby might even add a special thrill to it. And who is to say that the established view is the true one ultimately? I am not doing so, firmly believing that it is a most individual thing. You state your impression that younger doms sometimes are not taken serious by some older ones, and I can echo your impression. Age is not nearly as important as experience and quality, though it might be messed up, assuming that an older person is per se more experienced, which might not be true in general. I think that respect for each other is the most important thing between individuals, followed by inspiration and matching preferences, with their age being much less important, if everybody involved feels comfortable about it.
Rauber, I think we share quite the same view on things, and I am most happy about that. It is a pleasure for me to know you and get to know about your real-life experiences via your blog. Maybe we have the chance to meet in real-life sometime. I would be more than happy about such opportunity, as you induced most intense thought already in me, inspiring me a huge lot - even if I beware of taking your reports to be any model for an ideal, just as you warned not to take them as such.
Respectfully and with best regards, Roland