October 29, 2012

Story: Tim enslaved

Rome has never Fallen! 

Ever! Don't they know that the fools! For thousands of years embracing the Earth. Like a boa constrictor, squashing all to mold it at its own image. So who cares if Flanders is not free? Is any one free? Did the nationalists had to raise up? Is that why I am chained in this slave market chained to a marble slab waiting my fate? Tim felt bitter about all he had lost. Him who only ever wanted to live in peace. 

Someone showed interest in him. The slave master pulled him by his chain and started manhandling him showing of his virtues. Tim despised him. His Latin was atrocious...nothing but an educated barbarian brought to do Romes dirty work.

-"Tite ole sir see..tite ole."
Tim corrected him sardonically..he was a scholar after all. If he was to be sold he would be sold with proper Latin!
-"Tight Hole!"
Both purchaser and slavemaster stopped.
The purchaser laughed and moved on.
The slavemaster...no more than a brute hit Tim. 
"Cunt ass ole! I ill sel u to brothel not school!"
Tim fell while the brute kept kicking him in the ribs.

A roman pulled the brute away from Tim.
He laughed as he did it and told the slave master: "Friend, don't damage your own merchandise! Look, who will want to buy him like that all bloody? They will think he is one of those no one can control!"
"I will offer you 5000 euros for him!"
"No sir. he good slave. Do all service! Not complain like dog. 10000 euros sir."
"I will meet you half way as your rebel stands there no better than a mine slave. 7500. It is my last offer."

Tim watched the two barter for his life, sick to the stomach. A price was arranged and the slavemaster ridiculously thanked and bowed, awarding fake blessings to the buyer and his family.

"Follow me boy! I am Iosephus and you belong to me now."
Tim followed the man, half limping from his beating. 
"Are you hungry?"
"Yes dominus", Tim lowered his eyes. He had not eaten in two days.
The man opened his bag and gave him a sandwich.

"You smell boy!...Take your rags off. I bet they haven't washed you since they dragged you from your home.
What, you are ashamed? Strip or I will have to take my belt to you. I will buy you some clothes on the way".

Tim stripped naked and walked behind his owner in the middle of town trying to cover his modesty as best as he could. People looked at him snickering. Probably thinking he deserved nothing better for being a rebellious flem.

The dominus stopped in one of those cheap shops that sells second hand clothes and bought a few pieces. He also asked the owner for a bucket of water and with no warning just poured it down Tim's body. It was freezing.
"Scrub your self boy!" A couple more buckets were brought out and for the laughter of the passers by poured down Tim's shivering body.
"Now put these on". Tim dressed up quickly, wanting for his humiliation to stop. "Now you can enter my car without soiling it."

Sitting by the car a thin tall young man wearing a slave collar. He looked well fed and even got a pat on his head as he opened the door respectfully to his master. 
"Good boy Tom. Take us home...I decided to buy a wretched before he lost his life to his well educated Latin tongue."

Tom had a quick look at Tim with slight disgust. The few buckets of water had done just a bit of good to Tim's figure and was probably thinking about the seats he would have to clean again once arriving home. But he made no complaint.

Tim was tired and soon after seating in the car he fell asleep. He was just too tired to fight.

He dreamt about Peter. Not the Peter tied down in the market, beaten and naked, just moments before being taken away, but the handsome young man that had allowed Tim to take his virginity. Tim regretted the most not being able to protect those he loved.

When he woke up the car was stopping by a hotel.

The master did the check in and him and the other slave followed him to the room. While the dominus went downstairs to eat in the restaurant, a hotel servant brought two metal plates with food for the two slaves. Tim just looked at Tom too numb to ask anything. Tom just said: "don't worry. dominus is a good man he won't hit you if don't give him a reason and he always feeds his slaves properly". He ate with pleasure savouring each morsel of the simple food and keeping his eyes on Tom.

Tom had meanwhile removed his clothes and went for a quick shower...he returned naked...so handsome...no bruises visible on his body...maybe he was right. Tom even put the TV on. News showing the last rebellious strongholds falling and the Imperial decrees enslaving the whole of the Flemish population condemned as rebellious ungrateful dogs.
Tim felt like weeping but even for that he had no strength.

Master came back and was helped by Tom to strip and shower. Tim looked at his owners naked body...a hard on as Tom massaged his feet. Tom got a kiss...a tender one, and as if he was used to it layed on the bed tummy down and legs slightly opened.

"Make no noise boy". From his position on the floor Tim could clearly see his owners cock burying itself into the lads arse hole...he moaned a bit though but only got a stern shush from the master. It lasted for a while...until the master grunted satisfied and rolled on the bed. He was about to get out of the bed to lay on the floor, with no doubt a usual place for him to sleep when travelling with his master but master pulled him back.

"Turn the lights off, you are sleeping in bed tonight." The dominus embraced his slave and even kissed the back of his head.

Tim was transfixed...Was that how it had looked when he had pushed his cock into Peters virgin tight hole. He remembered his little buddy biting the pillow and fighting not to moan in pain...he remembered how it felt to fuck such a tight boy. How he became an animal towards the end and didn't even stopped fucking Peter when the pain was too much and he asked him to stop.

Tim knew he would feel what Peter felt. He knew it was a matter of time.

He fell asleep on the floor thinking about Peter...and Tom and his masters fat cock fucking Tom or was it Peter...or himself?

Tomorrow it would be another day...Tim felt the wet patch on his briefs, sighed and fell asleep.


This was a story that J wrote for me, some time after I first visited him. It randomly came into my thoughts again a month ago, and I thought it was too good not to show other people. Last week I told J he should start his own blog to publish stories like this, but he gave me permission to post it on my blog.
I really love the story - I guess mostly because there's quite a bit of personal stuff in it, but also because the writing style is very exciting, I really do think he's a better writer than I am. It's also a rather atypical BDSM/slave story, the alternative present setting makes it very interesting .
"Will the story be continued?" I hear some of you ask (yes, I hear voices in my head). Depends on J of course, I already know how it 'ends' in a way, but there's a long way to go with potentially plenty of adventures for the poor (or lucky!) slave.
Feel free to tell me what you think of the story :)

October 26, 2012


Guys, I need your help. I got a little assignment from J:

"Trying to make a list of ideal skills that the perfect master should have. Am putting less emphasis on the moral skills (as I mostly believe that you either have it or not: things like empathy for your subject, common sense etc) but actual skills: bondage, first aid, cp techniques...

See if the guys in your blog are willing to give you a hand with that."

So what do you think, what practical skills should the perfect master have? Feel free to just describe your ideal  master (even if it's not 100% realistic).
I've been thinking about it, and the first few things that came up for me were all related to personality and attitude (towards various aspects of BDSM), I never really thought about the practical skills. So I could use your help :)

October 19, 2012

FetishBound - London visit

I arrived Friday around noon in London, and went to J's place in Hounslow. I had a pretty long nap (over 2 hours, very weird...) and by that time J was home. We had a long talk (well, J talked, I listened), and before I knew it was already 6:30, and I still needed to eat something, get my haircut and take a shower. Plan A was to get to FetishBound very early, and plan B was to meet up with TSkin when his train arrived, so now only plan B was an option.

So I finally got out of the house - no thanks to J, who, when I was ready to leave, pushed me over the sofa edge and gave me a quick but hard beating!! I think he wanted me to be late so TSkin would punish me. Like I said many times before, he's evil!!! Even saying "I asked for it", pfff.... :)

Anyway - met up with TSkin at King's Cross and went to the club. Outside we met Kaz, it was nice finally meeting him after many months of reading his blog and chatting on twitter and such. Plus I think he's hot :)
Once inside, Kaz got out his ropes and started tying me up... but first I had to lick TSkin's boots, even though I didn't want to hehe.
Anyway, I was put on the table and Kaz did a nice hogtie on me. It felt quite good... TSkin first gagged me with a sock and then used a gasmask on me. This was nice...until people (no idea who!) started teasing and tickling me. I think at some point there were about 4 guys poking and teasing and tickling me... grrr!!

I was a bit in two minds after that - it was very intense and I could've done with a short rest, plus I started disliking the gasmask, but on the other hand I wanted to stay in bondage longer. Well, Kaz decided to untie me anyway. Other people wanted to use the table I think, I can't be selfish all the time I guess!
TSkin had me on my knees again licking his boots, but this time he put his other boot in my neck. My ass got beaten as well... it was a very humiliating position, but I think it must've looked quite hot actually :D
As always after an intense or "painful" scene, I needed a cuddle and luckily TSkin allowed me a little break :D

Though my next punishment was easily the worst of the evening...I had to suck another boy's cock!!! The horror! As a straight boy there really is no worse punishment than that!!
Okay, the boy, digiboi, was hot and had a very yummy cock... I worked up quite a sweat pleasuring him. I loved that someone put 2 padlocks around his balls hehe, made them a little swollen and sensitive... once I got bored of sucking and licking, I started treating his cock and balls a bit harder... I have to honestly say that was more fun for me than just sucking him off...I guess there is a bit of sadist in me. He loved it though. I also wasn't sure (I couldn't dare look!) but I think we attracted quite a crowd as well. To be honest he is a very hot boy and a regular at FB, and I don't think he'll ever not find people to play with.

While that was happening TSkin had some rope fun with smse14... I knew him from twitter, he's a very nice guy and a good bondage victim hehe. After a while I had my fun with him as well... when his arse was exposed I couldn't resist spanking him a bit. I don't think I did a good job at all (though he said it was fine afterwards), and I was feeling a bit self-conscious as I knew there were a few people watching me, so I didn't feel too comfortable and decided not to continue (although his arse cheeks were warmed up and looked very nice at that point...)

I think that was about all the play I got/did. It was nice seeing some familiar faces, obviously the more I go the more people I will start to recognise, and the easier it gets to make contact and have a chat or even play. I do regret not coming earlier, being tied up by StandThankAnon was something we talked about but unfortunately there was no time this time. My fault.

As I said last time, FetishBound is easily my favourite kink event, it's very relaxed, with a great variety in age and kinks. And you just have to love the kennel, so cute to see the pups play together hehe. Though Knotts (StandThankAnon's inner pup) was extremely naughty... that pup really needs a very strict handler!!
Anyway, just like last time it was a lot of fun, not only the play I got but also watching other people enjoy themselves... I hope to return many many times to this event.

The rest of my stay in London wasn't as exciting unfortunately... firstly because J was very very busy with uni and job training stuff, and I had a cold/allergies. On saturday I only went outside to get food, though J allowed me some fun by sniffing his underwear while he took a shower (I really love sniffing his used underwear...) and I had to admit to him I prefered cock over pussy... I only did that because I knew he would smack me otherwise hehe.

On Sunday I wanted to go to Camden because I felt a little better, but changed my mind as I didn't feel so good in the afternoon. Still wanted to leave the house so I took a nice walk. In the evening I was feeling cheeky and asked him if I could lick his feet at some point before I went back home. And I got my fun later that evening :) I still don't quite understand that particular fetish of mine, but oh well, as long as it's fun for me there's no harm done, right?

Met up with TSkin monday morning at Costas before his train left...(I, of course, didn't drink coffee...boys drink hot chocolate!!) I wish we could've spent more time together on this visit, maybe next time. We exchanged gifts (you can see what I got below...) and said goodbye. I went to Camden market after that...it was early so still very very empty, but I quite liked the atmosphere of the place...sort of punk and anarchistic in a way...but still mostly capitalistic! At some point I felt like I was in Hong Kong as two asian ladies in opposing stalls were trying to lure me to buy some food with them, one addressing me in her native language and another calling me "darling" hahaha. That was too funny. Anyway, I'm definitely going there again next time I'm in London. Maybe to get a nice tattoo or to get my nipples pierced :D

Monday evening we went to Nandos, I met J's ex-boyfriend who is a very charming man. Kind of a shame he's not into kink! But it's nice to see how much J, his current boyfriend, and ex-boyfriend all get along. Oh, and before that J gifted me a jockstrap... my first jockstrap!! (to be honest I think J gave it to me because he felt guilty about being too busy to play with me!)

And on Tuesday I went back home!
So yeah, I guess I didn't get as much play as I wanted to, and I definitely didn't get the punishments I deserved... but on the other hand, FB was fun, I really enjoyed seeing TSkin again, and as always I enjoyed staying with J and his boyfriend. My friendship with J is something I value greatly, I consider him one of my best friends, one of the many reasons being that he just accepts me the way I am, something that's very important to me. So it's kind of hard for me that I only see him face-to-face for a few days every 3-4 months or so... yes we chat online but it's not the same.


I don't have a good pic of the t-shirt TSkin gave me, so here's the one he sent me:
(rauberx on the front left side, "bad boy" on the back)

I wish I had some pictures to share from FetishBound, but you can only see my shoes in 2 pictures haha. Such a shame as I'm sure the hogtie Kaz did on me looked great, and I think the runners kit I was wearing (from Karrimor, picked up at Sportsdirect, very cheap), plus my nice sneakers, didn't look too bad on me either. Well, I liked it anyway.
But if you still want to see the pics of that evening, here they are.

That's all I have to say I think. You can check out TSkin's report of his stay in London.

October 11, 2012

weekend getaway

The past week or so, I've been thinking of going to London, mostly to attend FetishBound. Staying with J and attending FetishBound, that should be fun right? But then I also thought it would be quite expensive by train (but otherwise it's about 7 hours by bus and ferry), and worst of all, I've been feeling quite down lately and in a very antisocial mood, so meeting up with other people would be fairly dumb idea. On the other hand...being around kinky people and friends might be exactly what I need to lift my spirits. 

So for the past few days I've been going back and forth over this... until last night. TSkin and I were talking about meeting up at FetishBound, and going over a lot practical issues... and then admitted to each other we still hadn't bought train tickets to London. So I suggested we both did that at the same time... and we did. 
No way back now!!!!
I feel kind of guilty for spending quite a bit of money, but I am excited about meeting up with J and TSkin, and at FetishBound there will be a few people I also want to say hi to, especially Kaz who I've been wanting to meet for ages now (and hopefully one day I'll get to Manchester to have some bondage fun with him - on that note, why can't all you Manchester people live in London, it would be so much easier for me to meet you all :P ). 
And I also wouldn't mind (at all) being tied up by StandThankAnon... 

Only problem (FetishBound related) is that I have no gear... the wetsuit I talked about earlier really is a size too small (or my back/shoulders are too big!) as I can't zip it up properly - I can still wear it, but it'll look a bit silly with an open back, and besides, I feel quite claustrophobic in it so I wouldn't be able to wear it an entire evening anyway. 
In the past month I've been thinking of buying some military gear, I already have a camo t-shirt but I need trousers (and probably some decent boots) as well. There used to be 3 shops in my town that sell military gear, but apparently they're all gone. Still going to check out two locations but it'll probably be in vain. Only other solution is finding a shop that sells military gear in London...if anyone knows a good one, let me know. Army Surplus have all the stuff I want (I want this, this (urban camo like my t-shirt) and maybe even that) but they only do online orders now. 

Anyway, I'll look around in some shops tomorrow to see if they have something I like (even if it's just sports gear). Worst case scenario is that I'll have to ask J for some gear, or have TSkin bring some of his along for me... obviously I'd rather have my own stuff, but we'll see, not overly worried about that. 

So this leaves me with about 24 hours left to do all the practical stuff. I'm sure I'll forget things, but the most important thing is just showing up, right? :)

October 7, 2012

Sunday treat: some xtube videos!

I haven't done this in quite a while, but I saw some hot videos recently and I wanted to share...

First up: short piss play...

...by a familiar person hehe. I took advantage of TSkin's submissive side earlier this week and ordered him to do this... I was a bit worried that he wouldn't do the video after all since he lost some of his submissiveness towards me at the end of the week, but I'm very very happy he went through with it. I think it's easier to do things like this for a friend, instead of just some random dom on the internet. Still, I'm very proud of my mutt ;)
Now honestly, I'm not a huge fan of piss play, but I wanted him to do this because it's fairly easy to set up and doesn't require a lot of preparation (apart from actually having to piss). And of course, I wanted to show off to you guys, in a "hey, look at what my mutt did because -I- told him to do it!" -way. I know, I know, I'm taking this whole dom thing a bit too far.
I actually have more video assignment ideas, but I guess that's for another time :)

Secondly, Mikey duct taped and edged:

Very interesting bondage position (I'll have to try this out on someone one day hehehe), but the main reason why I find this video so hot is Mikey and all the sounds he makes :D And that moment when Daddy Tony asks him "how bad do you want to cum?" Oh man, so good. SO GOOD. Poor Mikey, he was so desperate!!! Hehe. It's honestly one of my favourite videos on xtube now. Really a pleasure, both visually and aurally :D

Lastly, a series of videos, this is part 1:

Sometimes, you don't realise you're in inescapable bondage until someone does something to you you find uncomfortable. I think this is such a case: the boy obviously has very sensitive balls, but I think at least half of his moaning is because he knows there's no escape from this "torture". He can moan and whine all he wants, but the tent in his underwear tells the true story (and I'm obviously imagining things but it looks to me he's even humiliated about his own hard-on).
Really love this video, having been in a similar situation, I can easily imagine myself in the boy's place, so it's highly erotic for me. Don't know if you guys feel the same but again it's one of the best videos I've seen on xtube.

Right, that's all.

October 5, 2012

dom, dommer, dommest

When I told my little bro there is now someone else calling me 'Sir', his reaction was "your Boss? Cannot be... you are a dom now, omg".

Well, yes, and no. If I had to put it simply: I can dom other people, but that doesn't make me dom in general. I want to quote one of my favourite movies (Fight Club): "sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken."
If I can use the same terminology: I (and other people) keep sticking more and more feathers up my butt and maybe I'm starting to look more and more like a chicken, but that still doesn't make me one. I can cluck and flap my wings, but I still can't lay any eggs :)

Also, the weird thing is that I seem to get more respect from some people now that I'm developing my dom side. This confuses me. If they respect me more for actually trying out new things, then great! But I get the feeling some people think a dom is worth more than a sub. Should I use caps to say what I think about that?Okay I'll use caps: that's NOT TRUE. Don't be silly! Think about it, what would a dom be without a sub?
Submission isn't negative, or weak. At least, it shouldn't be. Being a sub requires mental strenght... a sub has to trust the dom, sometimes with his life. That's a choice, and it takes strength to make that choice. (well, unless you do the thinking with your other head and you just take risks and don't think about the consequences...)

Now, back to my situation.
It is a bit weird to call TSkin a mutt, and talking to him like he's a sub, after I've been calling him "Boss" for the past 6 months. However, knowing him for that long means I know most of his turn-ons, and he has sent me a nice list with likes, dislikes and limits (though I should thank his new Boss for that).
Obviously that doesn't mean anything unless there's something I like doing as a dom in his lists of likes. Well, there's plenty, and I hope we get to meet up soon as I intend to give him some dog training. Not that I'm that experienced with it (apart from making a man drinking water out of a bowl on the floor in my living room just by pointing at the bowl), but I'm 100% sure I will enjoy it.
I also want to use him as my bondage subject...I want to try out a couple of things, and I know I'll be more relaxed with him compared to any random guy. And I'm sure there's a lot more kinky trouble he's going to be in when the time comes hehe. I think I'm developing more and more into a spanking top, so I'll always need more "victims" to spank :D
It'll be a learning experience for me, but I don't really want to think about what the "right" way to dom is, I just want to have some fun with him.

In other dom news (one bad, one good): the guy I had over at my house a couple of weeks back deleted his profile on the site I met him. Last thing he told me is that he had a pretty bad experience with some guy, from what I understood the blame for that might've been partly his for not clearly stating his limits... but I understand he probably wanted to take a break after something like that.
Good news is that Tallsub is interested on doing a one-on-one session at my house... bad news is that it has to be on a weekday during 'office hours', which isn't so easy to arrange for me. Anyway, we'll see.

October 3, 2012

Based on true events

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away... (well, unless the galaxy you're in is the Milky Way, and you're in the Sol system, and you live on Earth, in the UK specifically - then you're pretty close)

There was a teenage Girl. While emotionally very fragile, she had a high sex drive and many kinky thoughts in her head.
By chance or by fate, she met a Boy on an online chat service. She found the Boy to be quirky and funny, and wanted to talk to him all the time. After a while, she convinced herself she was in love with him. The Boy,  introverted and sheltered, was initially confused by her declaration of love, but admitted he had feelings for her too. He enjoyed talking about kink and sex with her (amongst many other things), and after a while, in an act of devotion to her, he gave himself to her as a slave, to be used by her for the rest of his life in any way she wanted. Despite that, he knew Girl has a submissive side as well, and was happy to 'switch' for her.

Unfortunately, the emotional instability of Girl was something Boy had quite a lot of trouble with. No matter how he reacted, Girl had bouts of deep depression and strong suicidal feelings. This affected Boy as well, he hated the feelings of helplessness he had, and for his own sanity, he felt he had no choice but to end the relationship. The fact that there was an ocean (well, a small strip of North Sea) between them didn't help either.

This was not the end of their interations, however. They remained (mostly) friends, and their talk about sex and kink continued, even when Girl had relationships with other boys.
Despite the distance, they met up several times. The first time, very early in their relationship, they met up for a day in a park in Londinium (current day London). They spent the afternoon hand in hand. Even that simple, soft gesture made something stir in Boy's loins.

They met up two more times. In their next meeting, Girl had a birthday present for Boy... a leather bracelet, studded with silver letters that spelled SLAVE. Boy wore it all weekend, even when they went to a summer festival in a London park to see some Daft Punks. After the festival, Girl handcuffed Boy and fell asleep. Boy couldn't be happier.
In their last meeting, a year later, Boy realised his feelings for Girl had all but vanished. He still had kinky fun with her, mostly as a dom, playing with her body, whipping her tits, pussy and ass, and making her cum. But it was done with very little feeling, almost as an obligation towards her. Maybe Boy knew that this was their last meeting,  and this was his way of giving her a parting gift?

Soon after, Girl met a man, and after a few years they got married, and at present day have a child. Boy found out all of this through the Book of Faces, since Girl broke off all direct communications with him. Boy understands, in a way, thinking she might be afraid of her own feelings but hoping she doesn't consider their time together as nothing more than a bad memory. Girl was Boy's first, in both sex and kink, and despite the problems they had, he still considers the time they had as something special and precious. Boy, being a sentimental fool at times, or maybe just a childish goof,  is sometimes still upset she hasn't set him free as a slave, and therefor still feels she owns him. Even though she probably doesn't even think of him anymore, and it was all just words to her.

She lived happily ever after it seems...and Boy... grew up to be...(wait for it...)

Yes, your very own Rauber!

 Everything I said really  happened (and more, but I wanted to keep it fairly short). I wonder if she would actually enjoy reading my blog...she was very aware of my bi side and always teased me about finding me a boyfriend (and, at some point we actually had cyber with a mutual (fairly vanilla) friend - one I still talk to occassionaly on twitter, him and a girl I met on the same chat as Girl are actually the only people I still talk to from my early internet days (around 2002), but that as an aside heh). Not sure she's still as kinky now as she was then though, I haven't spoken to her in about 4 years.

A funny fact I was reminded of this morning is that my first 'secret' blog actually started with me complaining about her mood swings and occassional weird behavior (I'm sure she lied about some things just to get more attention - teen behavior eh), and it only later became a kinky blog. Then I had another kinky blog on livejournal (because I forgot the password of the first one), before finally ending up here. And to be fair this blog only really started about 2 years ago, with my first BDSM session. But really, everything kinky started with Girl.
Oh, she was also the first person I ever told about my chastity devices kink, she accepted it, though we never really had any fun with it in any of our meets.

So, a lot has changed in 10 years...or maybe not that much?

October 2, 2012

blog talk

I get most of my blog traffic from links on other blogs. You can see my own blog list on your left side (scroll down a bit - and don't be afraid to ask me a question on formspring now that you're watching that part of my blog!), but I'm going to do an extra special mention of the blogs that I get the most traffic from:
http://www.metalbondnyc.com - I think he only recently added me to his very long list  of interesting bondage sites and blogs, but I still got quite a bit of traffic from that. Anyway - great site to follow, great variety of topics, something for everyone really. 
http://badgroveboy.com/ - I think I mentioned this blog many times already, but this is really one of my favourite blogs... only downside is that the boy doesn't update enough :P
http://lockedndenied.blogspot.com/ - I get a lot of traffic from this blog as well; I hope those visitors aren't too disappointed since I hardly talk about chastity anymore...
http://bondageforthebigman.blogspot.com - Great blog if you like chubby guys in bondage, a mix of vids/pics from the 'net and personal experiences.
So if you don't follow these yet, do it now!

Anyway, since I'm getting many new visitors and followers, maybe I should explain a few things about my blog. It's a personal blog, which means I talk about my own experiences, wishes, turn-ons etc. It also means I'm not shying away from talking about some negative experiences and feelings. Like I said before, I'm not a porn blog, but a real-life blog, and bad things happen. I think the BDSM community as a whole tends to see itself through rose-coloured glasses, and people new to it might think everything is easy and fun and bad stuff can never happen. I hope my blog is fairly balanced in that regard. It also means my blog is more boring than 99% of kink blogs out there, but so be it.
 It's also not meant to be a manual for other people or a "this is how it should be" guide to BDSM, just my own experiences and other personal stuff. For example, when I write down what happened in a BDSM session, I really write that for myself, so I won't forget basically. I like reading old session entries, and old entries in general really, sometimes it's a nice memory, other times less nice, but for me it's good that I've written them down. If people enjoy reading them and if I can inspire someone with it, that's nice, but not my main goal at all.

I read quite a few kinky blogs, and often I think "oh that's interesting, I should comment, or write about it in my own blog". But, of course, I rarely do. I know I read a few interesting entries a week or two ago, but I forgot which blogs, and I'm too lazy to find out, sorry :) But there are two recent entries I want to talk about.

First is an entry on Master Dream's Precious Treasure. I'll let you read it, but basically it's about people who aren't owned/collared/whatever think they have nothing interesting to say. I disagree with that as well. They shouldn't feel intimidated by more experienced people, and like MDPT says, they have their own dreams and aspirations, and it might not be a bad thing to write that all down. The fact that you're inexperienced doesn't mean you have nothing to say.
(Side note: I know most of my readers are gay males, but MDPT really is an interesting blog to follow, regardless of your gender and sexual preferences)

Secondly, my Boss (...or is he? :P) made an entry about him now being owned by a younger guy. We talked about this, and he seems to be very insecure about the age difference (which admittedly is pretty big). I think it can work, and personally I feel the distance is a bigger problem than the age difference.

I have a few things to say about this in general though (yes, I'm going to start ranting). In my experience, there are a lot of unwritten rules in the BDSM world. One of those is that older should always dominate younger. While I think this is more or less natural, as in, the older guy teaches the young guy, akin to pederasty in ancient Greece, I find that imposing it as a rule to be limited, old-fashioned and maybe even degrading for younger guys. Just because you're older doesn't mean you're better at something. Just because you're young doesn't mean you can't be a dom. I get the impression younger doms don't get taken seriously by some of the less flexible and less open-minded people.
A lot of people really have that limited "this is what BDSM is supposed to be like and nothing else" mindset, which upsets me. They are limiting themselves to new experiences and setting a bad example for others. Sure, everyone has his or her own idea of what BDSM should be for them personally, but they shouldn't apply their own vision onto others. Everyone's different. But I do think there should only be one basic, general rule, and that's that everything must happen safe, sane and consensual. All the rest is up to personal preferences, and I think it's wrong to force anything other than that onto people.
This is why I try not to judge other people and their BDSM relationship... it's their thing, as long as they enjoy it, who am I to judge them? I'm happy there are plenty of non-judgmental people around, but really, sometimes it can annoy me greatly.

That'll be enough for today :) 

October 1, 2012


I had an interesting weekend! I learned some new things in the session on Friday, and actually felt quite submissive for the rest of the weekend. And not normal submissive but a kind of slutty submissiveness that doesn't happen a lot (to put it bluntly: I wanted to suck cock SO BAD). I even had some naughty thoughts on a Sunday morning walk through the dunes... most of the dunes are fenced off since it became protected nature stuff, but sometimes there are holes in the fences you can go through, and the shrubbery is pretty dense so no-one would see you if you wanted to have some naughty adventures in the open air... hehe. In my case, I imagined TSkin being there, and me taking him through a hole in the fence to a quiet spot, where I would suck his cock...  Thinking that made me hard while walking :)

I've been talking to my little bro a lot this weekend, and no matter what we talk about, he definitely triggers my dom side. And my daddy side as well I guess. Sometimes I want to hug him, other times I want to put him over my knee and spank him hard. Anyway, it looks like he'll be able to realise one of his dreams shortly, but I'll let him talk about that in his blog.

I was talking to both TSkin and my little bro Sunday afternoon. TSkin was in a submissive mood, and talking to my little bro slowly put me in a more dominant mood, so we had some fun talking about what I would do to TSkin as a dom/handler. And I imagined having both at my feet, both of them as my toys :) Some of my ideas were pretty nice I think. Like, TSkin is a much more experienced sub, so I would let him demonstrate  how to do things like rimming me and sucking my cock in the way I like it, and then it would be the boy's turn. And of course I could do contests between them, and reward the winner and punish the loser. And spankings for everyone! My playtime on Friday confirmed it again: I really, really, really love spanking guys. Really.

Obviously the likeliness of having the two together is pretty low, but it was a fun thought. My boy was already off to bed, otherwise I would've involved him more in this. Anyway, it was fun talking with TSkin about his sub side, and especially his mutt side as well, I imagined some more things that we could do next time we meet. He is going to do a lot of sniffing and licking! And a whole lot more...

Oh, and a funny fact: earlier this week, I had a dream in which us three arranged to meet up, even rented a place, but due to unforeseen circumstances out of our control (some realistic stuff but also some weird stuff that only happens in dreams) we were never actually in the same room at the same time. So it was actually a very frustrating dream... it's been ages since I actually had a fun kinky dream. Maybe because I'm already doing enough fun kinky stuff while I'm awake heh.

Next update: some blog talk and random rambling.

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