March 8, 2012

one year of sessions + blog talk

I had my first ever BDSM session around this time last year, you can read about it here. Ah, how deliciously naive I was heh. I still remember it well, how incredibly nervous I was, but also how horny I got when he put the blindfold on and locked my arms behind my back... and I thought: "this is it. It's happening. Your fantasies are becoming real". It felt great, being tied up felt like some kind of release, like I could let go of any doubts I had.

That was also the first time another man played with my body and masturbated me. I obviously enjoyed that as well, and since then I've grown into quite the cocksucker I guess. I mean, I'm probably really bad at it (I suck, ahaha! ...yeah that was lame), but I can't deny I like doing it.

I'm also lucky I got to meet some great doms/masters on my journey so far, both online and in real-life. Master R has been my main 'trainer' of sorts, I'm always excited when he orders me to come over for a session. He is always pushing my limits in one way or another, and I know he cares about me a great deal. The hug and the "good boy" at the end of a session are just as important to me as the play itself really.

Anyway, what I'm trying to say with all this: anyone who's interested in BDSM and is too scared to meet up with someone...don't be!! BDSMers are perverts, yes, but they're also nice people (in general). Try to find someone you're comfortable with, or go to a munch or a beginner's evening in a BDSM club... plenty of possibilities. Nothing to be afraid of.
The hardest part really is taking that first step...once you get past your initial worries and doubts, you can enjoy, and experiment, and do anything you want. Then you'll be free. There is no shame in being a beginner in the BDSM world...but it would be a shame if you never get to experience some of your fantasies in real life. To paraphrase a famous advertising campaign: just do it!

I'll stop talking about this now before things get too mushy!

Blog talk:
February was a short(er) month, but I never had this many views on my blog, and it's quite a big difference compared to last month. I have to thank everyone who put me on their blog list, I really get most of my views from that. And, of course, I always get a crazy amount of views when I do a session report with one or more pictures. In the the three days after the "100% slave" post, I got over 350 views, which is about half of the amount of views I got in January. Crazy. You're all dirty perverts, you know :P
But seriously, thanks for reading my blog, hope you enjoy it, feel free to comment, ask questions, etc.
I'm pretty happy with the way my blog is now; I think it's a good mix of session reports and some random rants that are typical for blogs I guess. I still do this blog mainly for myself, so I'm not going to apologise for entries like that :)

And maybe a few words about my writing style: if some of my entries look like they've been written different people at different times, well, that's not far from the truth actually. I have a very chaotic mind, especially when it comes to creative things (I consider blog writing a form a creativity...). I wouldn't have it any other way though, it's...kind of fun actually. Many times I start an entry with what eventually becomes the middle or ending of the entry, and for me it's fun trying to glue everything together so it more or less looks like a coherent entry.

This entry, for example, was started the 3rd of March...the first thing I wrote wast he first 'blog talk' paragraph. Then I decided I needed to talk about how it's been one year since my first session, and since the blog talk was relatively short, I decided to put two entries into one, so I started writing the first 2 paragraphs of the 'sessions' bit.
I had a lot of trouble writing the next few paragraphs, I could never find the right words, and as with every entry, I wrote and deleted a lot of things. I guess there's a bit of a perfectionist in me as well. I sometimes even edit old entries because I don't agree with the words I used. I think 'normal' people would be able to write an entry like this in 20 minutes max, but it sort of took me 5 days to find the right words and be (relatively) happy with the result. So some entries (like this one) are hard work in a way, but I really enjoy doing them as well. I love playing with words really, especially when using other languages than my native one (English is my second language).

I didn't really mean to talk about my writing style that much - that was definitely something that went almost automatically! Also, I always seem to write my entries quite late, usually just before bed, so most of the time there are still some typing/spelling errors in it somewhere, and I'm always embarrassed when I read the entry again in the morning and find those mistakes. I should probably start writing entries when I'm still relatively 'awake'...but then the creative part of my brain usually only wakes up at night...
Anyway, I'll shut up now.

2 comments:

  1. I'm really enjoying your blog, I found it from the locked & denied blog. As a fellow sub it's great to read about your adventures and your thoughts on the lifestyle, if that's the right phrase. Keep it up!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for the kind words! That means a lot to me :)

      Delete

Pageviews past week