second week

2 weeks done, 4 weeks to go.

Obviously the highlight of the past week was the bondage session with MasterP. Like with all good memories (a nice trip, or a great concert), I sometimes think "did that really happen?" because it was almost too good to be true.

Unfortunately it looks like we won't be able to meet up next week, and the week after that will be even more difficult for me. I'll probably meet up with another master (or masters!) in the coming weeks or months, but for obvious reasons MasterP will always be my first choice. I'm a generally distrusting person, but he made me feel at ease and I somehow trusted him right away. I really have a great deal of respect for him.

Apart from that the week has been rather slow, until friday night. I went out with a friend and came home rather late, but somehow I was really really horny. It might have something to do with a package I got, which included a leather bracelet. I love leather bracelets, but I have super-small wrists and most bracelets look silly on me (well, they look great, but I look silly). But this one is more like a shoelace, I wrap it around my wrist, put a knot in it and that's it. It's perfect for me. I don't consider myself a leather hound, but it definitely turned me on. I wasn't locked at that time (on thursday I noticed some chafing/redness on my ballsac because of the cb6000 ring, so I went without to let it heal), so I put myself in my cb2000 for the rest of the weekend.

I stayed horny all weekend, and on sunday I was so fed up with being semi-hard all the time that I installed the spikes (points of intrigue). The middle set. The small set doesn't really hurt, but the middle one...well, it hurts when you get hard, and not in a sexy way. It HURTS. Now, my penis seemed to have remembered this from last time, and I only got hard once in about 8 hours or so (and it was when I was reading random stuff on locked'n'denied!). I did take the spikes off to go to bed though, I rather value my sleep.

I'm still wearing the cb2000 now, and it only came off to change the spikes. In many ways, I prefer the cb2000 to the cb6000. It's much easier to clean, the cage is more suited for growers (or shrinkers) like me, and I find it visually more appealing. Downside is that it's more clunky, and I think heavier than the cb6000. My ideal chastity device would definitely be more like the cb2000 than the cb6000. It's a shame they never made a cb2000s, like, a smaller (in diameter) and slightly shorter cage. That would've been perfect for me.

Just like the last time I was locked up for more than a week, I definitely notice myself being more submissive, or at the very least entering a sort of submissive mindset. It's something I struggle with sometimes. Part of me thinks that being a submissive is my raison d'être, but another part of me is very strongly opposed to that. Basically, it's an internal macho/dom vs. sub fight. I'd talk more about it, but it's hard to explain. I know some other people have this too though.

One of those submissive mindset ideas is this: I want to be a good submissive boy, but right now I'm still a naughty boy. The only way to be a good boy is to a) be in prolonged chastity, no masturbation at all, and b) recieve regular spankings to remind me I'm a submissive boy. Ideally, I should be spanked daily.

There more, but I'm going to stop now before I make myself too horny again. Bye!

first bondage session

I'm afraid this won't be a very coherent blog post, as I'm still trying to process everything that happened in the past couple of hours. One thing I can say is that I enjoyed it tremendously.

Maybe I should start with MasterP (that's what I'll call him, I don't want to use his real nor his recon name). His profile says he's 50, but he still looks incredible. I mean, I'm not into "old" men, but I thought he was attractive (I even said this to him when the subject of age preference was brought up heh). Also, as I found out, he's definitely worthy of being called "Master".

I'm not going to describe everything we did, but basically there were 3 positions, in the first one I was standing up, and most of the time my arms were behind my back. In the second one, he made me sit on a stool, and sort of tied my cock and balls to the stool. There was also some intense nipple play here, and some spanking. Third position had me against a closet, with my wrists tied to the top of the closet, in a sort of spread-eagled position. This part had the most intense spanking/whipping of the whole session.

Probably the most unique thing of the session is that I was blindfolded the whole time. It definitely made things more intense. Not just during play, but in between I could hear him move around and get new equipment, but I had no idea what he was going to do to me next. In a way, this was one of the biggest turn-ons for me.

I absolutely loved the way he handled my body, and especially my nipples and cock and balls. Honestly, he did things to me I didn't even know were possible! He made my already fairly sensitive nipples SUPER-sensitive, and he used some techniques on my cock...I can't describe them really - couldn't see what he did either (one disadvantage of being blindfolded maybe...) but it felt great, never felt anything like it.
Also, I'm definitely a spanking slut. It's weird because it never really turned me on that much when watching porn or whatever, but now, I couldn't get enough of it. It was actually the first thing I said after the session: "next time, feel free to make the spanking more intense!". Yeah. Spanking slut.

So I really enjoyed it, but what did he think of it? Well, I "passed the test" (his words, after the session). Even in the short break we had he already said I make a good bondage slave. Apparently I have very expressive body language (read: I get a hard-on the second something turns me on). It made it very easy for him to adjust certain things, but honestly, pretty much everything he did to me was hot and made my penis grow (if it wasn't already at full size). I suppose about the only thing that didn't turn me on as much was the cock and ball bondage, although I suppose it could've served as a quiet/slow moment in between the intense sessions.

It was a pretty short session because he had to leave for work. After the session he said something like "you wanted it to last longer, right? Well, there's PLENTY of things I could do to you later..." I thought something like "huh? But we already did so much! There's actually more???" Yeah, objectively speaking, we didn't do that much, but this was my first ever bondage session, and I already experienced a lot more than I thought I would.

So, yeah, it was an awesome experience. I hope to meet up with him soon, but it's quite hard finding time to meet up. I think I might even skip a uni lesson if we really can't meet up every 2 or 3 weeks or so (at least! I'd obviously prefer twice a week or something heh). I feel really really good with him, I'm really not a very trusting person but I trusted him almost instantly. And the way he handled me...really, it feels like a privilege being trained by him. I'm not worthy!

Okay, I think I wrote enough now...oh yeah!!! I did have my camera with me, but he didn't take any pictures. His argument was that it breaks up the session, and I totally agree with him. So yeah, no hot bondage pictures, sorry!

first week

Two unexpected things happened in my first week of lock up:
1) I got sick (some kind of flu, still suffering from it)
2) I got several people contacting me through recon, offering me a bondage session.

Thanks to be ill, I hardly had the time to be horny or anything. In fact, I didn't wear my cb on Tuesday and Wednesday night, and didn't even get a hard-on (although I probably got a morning erection, but not being in the cb I didn't feel it) . On the third day though, it just felt "wrong" to not be locked up, so I put it back on, and it hasn't come off since then, except to clean it. It made me realise that being locked up is no longer a kink, it's an addiction, something I NEED. Unless my future partner is very strongly opposed to me wearing one, I'm pretty sure I'll be wearing a chastity device of some sort for the rest of my life.

That reminds me, is anyone member of the cb3000 group on yahoo? They have a cb6000 hypnotism video. Well, it's a bunch of pictures, with a voice saying things like "you feel good when you're in the cb6000. You ALWAYS want to be in the cb6000" etc. I think it's pretty good, but it's only about the cb6000. You know, if I was a keyholder to someone, I'd make a similar mp3 file, but personalised and adjusted to whatever chastity device he's wearing, and I'd force him to listen to it 3 times a day. I'd try to make him feel good about being locked up, saying that locked boys are good boys, and that I'm proud of him. Stuff like that. I think the boy would enjoy that, especially if it's a long-distance relationship.
Anyway, just one of those ideas I get. Funny how I get these while I'm locked up myself.
If anyone wants that cb6000 hypnosis file without joining the group, let me know, I'll try to upload it somewhere (or send it straight to your email, it's less than 3MB).

The recon thing then. Well, I've had an account there for over a year, but I really only registered there, made a profile, and then never came back. Until I saw a link to someone's profile somewhere on this site. Logged in, updated my profile a bit, and went back offline. The next day, I logged in again, and saw a message from someone. Asked me what exactly I was looking for, etc. I did a very long reply, and asked him what he was offering. He said he's offering me bondage training, taking it slow at first, playing it safe, etc. so I was definitely interested. We were going to meetup on Wednesday, but by that time I was pretty ill, so I asked him to do it next week. He agreed.

Talked to him on the phone a couple of times, he seems nice enough. About the only "negative" thing about his is that he's 50, which is a bit older than what I'm normally looking for. But yeah, I told him it's not about sex or anything, I just want to have a bondage session. I'm really looking forward to it, but I'm really nervous as well. And when I'm nervous, I do stupid things, so I hope I don't embarrass myself.
Oh yeah, and I asked him if he wanted to take pictures of me all tied up, and he agreed! I'm quite happy with that, I have a couple of good pics I took of myself (long live the self-timer on cameras!) but it's going to be nice to get some new ones from an actual bondage session.

That's all I have to say for now. Next update will probably be on tuesday (unless my bondage date ends up being a serial killer that is).

alive

Long time no update. I know.
But really, nothing interesting happened since my last post, up until about a month ago. I found this site: http://www.lockedndenied.com/ and it has given me the motivation to go for a longer lock up period. 6 weeks this time, and I've just finished my first week. I'll write about how it went in my next update, just wanted to do a "I'm not dead!" post first.