London visit afterthoughts

It happens almost every time before I leave to London: I think "I'm not in the right mood, now is not the right time". It wasn't any different now; the days before I left I didn't feel kinky/horny at all and I wasn't in a submissive mood at all. I also had a few physical issues that only pop up when I'm feeling very stressed, so those few days were a bit weird. It was only on the Eurostar that random thoughts and memories made me feel happy and positive, and getting somewhat closer to a good mindset. There is, and always has been, a sort of transitional period of at least one or two days when I'm there (going from free boy to owned/collared boy), but it wasn't so bad this time.

It was a very different visit compared to the one last summer. Now it was mostly just Sir and me when it came to kinky play; last summer a lot of my play was with other people. And this time I had no complaints when it came to not getting enough play at home hehe. I guess like most subs I'm needy/greedy in that regard (someone called me a "hungry bitch" once heh), and last summer I felt a little bit ignored, and a few things didn't feel right (but that's complicated and I might save that for another entry...)

Since it was a short visit there were a few things we normally do but didn't have time for. No pup play or mummification, no over-the-knee spanking, oh and I think I licked his feet once (!) Oh, poor me! But I really can't complain, we tried some new stuff and everything worked out great.

One thing I'm not certain I enjoyed was getting beaten. Really weird, I know, but this time it just...kinda hurt, you know? I think I've said this before but I really don't consider myself a painslave or anything, especially not when it comes to whips and canes and stuff like that. I much prefer a spanking by hand, but that is usually done in an entirely different mindset.
Anyway, the enjoyment I did get from getting beaten this time was submitting to that beating... Like, when Sir wants to cane me he usually bends me over the sofa edge, he doesn't tie me up or secures me, and every time he hits me I jump up because it hurts! So, I kind of want him to stop, but at the same time, I want to be a good boy, a good sub, who doesn't complain when his Master wants to beat him... after all, any attention a dom gives to his sub is good attention, and the sub should be happy with that. So, I get back into position and wait for the next stroke of the cane :( It's a tough life being a boy... And of course afterwards I have to thank him for taking the trouble to beat me, and I get a hug. This cycle of events, including thanking him for the beating, is kind of a turn on, but the actual pain isn't.

There was a kind of pain I did like though... Deep Heat! I probably shouldn't say this too loud but I really do love having Deep Heat on my balls. It's a sort of annoying, slow and slow-burning pain, basically the opposite of the sharp pain of the cane (...huh, is it a coincidence that pain and cane rhyme?)
I guess I find this kind of pain easy to manage, although that depends on the dose obviously. If it's not enough I hardly feel it, if it's too much... well, I never actually had too much really. But when I have enough, I can still feel some of it hours after it was first applied. We tried some tabasco on my piss slit, and that was more painful and annoying in a 'hard' way, I certainly didn't enjoy it as much as the Deep Heat on my balls. But I heard next time I might have to do a 'tabasco wank' - not sure I will like that!

Something I really enjoyed this time was the piss play. Sir has been pissing on me since our first meeting, but I had no strong positive or negative feelings about it, until this visit. I don't really know why but I really loved it this time. Sir has assured me I will get further piss training... I get horny thinking about that and I'm very happy to be Sir's piss boy :D

Our first cigar play was fun as well, and is also something we'll be doing again. Like I said in the previous entry, it was very exciting and part of that was because it required a lot of trust between us.
Similar thing with him "bullying" me, this gets worse every visit but I trust him enough that it doesn't get out of hand. In the club he trampled me, put his boot in my face, and gut-punched me as well, in addition to the usual slapping/pushing about. This isn't really high on my list of BDSM things I enjoy, it's a bit of a challenge (more mentally than physically) but I know afterwards I'll get a hug from Sir. Yeah that's not very hardcore but that's the way we play hehe.

Anyway, it was a great visit, and it made me feel positive about my future as his boy. There is still so much we can do, and I want to improve as a sub as well, I get the feeling we won't get bored any time soon. I feel our friendship is as strong as ever as well, so I'm very happy with just about everything now. Still no sign of any kind of serious sub-drop, so that's nice as well.

That's all I can think of for now!